May 8th, 2011

blackheart in hand

(no subject)

This is the first Mother's Day my kids not only made me cards (they were lovingly and carefully crafted and beautifully rendered) but actually brought me a gift.  I now have a beautiful pair of silver heart-shaped delicate dangling earrings.  Very sweet.  They did good.  It occurred to me that if I was the "Dad" (which, I guess I am, except biologically) that I would give them money and take them shopping.  So, I gave them money and off they went to the local general store.  They came home with a little gold jewelry box and their faces shining.  Good stuff, this Mothering thing.

In other news, I'm cycling with the seasons.  Ready, at long last, I think, to come out from the hiding this winters events carried me into.  Life is sweet and good.  I'm learning patience and that, even though I'm a very stubborn Capricorn, I can't always have everything "my way."  Perhaps life would have been easier had I learned this a little earlier?  

So, I am staying busy and productive as I wait for people I don't know and who don't really care about me as a person to make really big decisions about the next phase of my life.  Accountants, bankers, lawyers, insurance companies, lenders, real estate agents, property owners . . . a whole collection of automatons requiring my life story be spelled out in black and white numbers, credit ratings, probabilities and bottom lines.  They will weigh my "worth" and make decisions based upon their judgments.  I do not like this one bit.

Yet.  I will keep jumping through hoop after flaming hoop.  Because it's time to put down roots in some darkly rich soil and grow in one place for a long, long while.  I may be trading in my pointy toed, black healed boots for muck boots and my long flowing skirts for overalls.